1
00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:50,270
You’re gonna have to force me to look at that

2
00:04:01,500 --> 00:04:04,000
No

3
00:05:41,615 --> 00:05:42,715
Fuck me!

4
00:05:42,715 --> 00:05:46,615
Oh fuck oh fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!

5
00:05:49,225 --> 00:05:50,500
Fuck!

6
00:06:45,099 --> 00:06:46,519
Oh Jesus

7
00:08:13,199 --> 00:08:13,799
Sorry

8
00:12:13,120 --> 00:12:14,720
That sucks

9
00:15:40,596 --> 00:15:42,326
Thank you

10
00:17:43,980 --> 00:17:47,380
When I was fifteen, my hair
was longer than it’s ever been

11
00:17:47,380 --> 00:17:48,490
in my whole life.

12
00:17:48,900 --> 00:17:50,870
I had been allowed to grow it this long

13
00:17:50,870 --> 00:17:53,023
because I had promised my parents that

14
00:17:53,023 --> 00:17:56,624
I was growing it to donate it
to the charity Locks of Love.

15
00:17:56,994 --> 00:18:00,710
Of course the longer it got, the
less I wanted my head to be shaved,

16
00:18:01,090 --> 00:18:04,480
and I was also receiving a
lot of comments from people,

17
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:06,160
along the lines of

18
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:07,750
“are you a boy or a girl?”

19
00:18:07,750 --> 00:18:09,990
“You look like a
woman from behind”

20
00:18:09,990 --> 00:18:12,490
I remember an adult woman,
a friend of my mother’s,

21
00:18:12,490 --> 00:18:14,491
saying something to the effect of:

22
00:18:14,491 --> 00:18:18,331
“This hair, this beautiful
hair, is wasted on a boy.”

23
00:18:18,971 --> 00:18:21,471
Of course, I didn’t feel like a boy

24
00:18:21,471 --> 00:18:25,751
I didn’t know what I felt like, and I didn’t
understand the concept of transness yet,

25
00:18:25,751 --> 00:18:29,201
but I desperately wanted to
hold onto this long hair.

26
00:18:30,001 --> 00:18:34,251
When my parents finally decided it was
time for it to be shaved off and donated,

27
00:18:34,601 --> 00:18:38,021
my dad didn’t want to pay a
hairdresser just to shave my head.

28
00:18:38,211 --> 00:18:41,300
So he shaved my head,
using his beard trimmer,

29
00:18:41,650 --> 00:18:44,270
in our bathtub, at home.

30
00:18:44,430 --> 00:18:47,160
My mom rubber banded my
hair into little segments,

31
00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:50,680
and then he came in and
shaved it, down to the scalp.

32
00:18:51,510 --> 00:18:54,270
He took pictures with his digital camera

33
00:18:54,590 --> 00:18:56,810
sort of… the whole way through,

34
00:18:57,353 --> 00:19:00,603
and there’s one picture
in particular of my head

35
00:19:00,603 --> 00:19:03,343
where only the right side is shaved,

36
00:19:03,663 --> 00:19:06,763
and I have a frozen kind of smile on my face,

37
00:19:07,343 --> 00:19:11,983
and I remember in that moment feeling like
the ugliest thing that had ever lived,

38
00:19:12,573 --> 00:19:16,973
all of the kind of femininity I felt
I had built up through growing my hair

39
00:19:16,973 --> 00:19:22,783
had been annihilated, and I felt
vulnerable, and exposed, and destroyed.

40
00:19:23,423 --> 00:19:26,433
I wanted to revisit this
experience for this performance

41
00:19:26,433 --> 00:19:31,803
with the same attitude that Yoko Ono
brought to her performance, Cut Piece,

42
00:19:31,803 --> 00:19:34,303
in which she wore her nicest clothes

43
00:19:34,303 --> 00:19:36,803
for the audience to cut into pieces.

44
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:39,770
I wanted to approach this
performance with the attitude

45
00:19:39,770 --> 00:19:43,510
that something precious was about
to be modified, or destroyed.

46
00:19:45,150 --> 00:19:47,010
Thank you for watching.